Google Life

A few contemplative conversations and random observations, off late, have stirred up these thoughts in my mind. Ever since we’re born, we’re always on this perpetual quest. The quest of love, laughter and that of a fulfilling life.

As a child we want to be thrown up in the air, just so that someone lovingly holds us before we crash land into the ground. We want to be fed, and be fed well, or else we cry, *(Yea we all learn the art of emotional blackmail fairly early on in our lives). We also constantly want the attention. We want people to play with us, notice how amazing our dimples look when we smile. We want them to buy us the best presents when they come for our crazy birthday parties. We want them to sing and clap really loud for us just before they’ve deserved a small piece of their cake.

When we grow older, we crave for recognition. We crave for someone to like our new haircut, love our new bag, and go crazy over the new pair of denims we picked up. We also want someone to love our choice of restaurants, movies, music, women / men. We want them to go gaga over the latest gizmo we flaunt. We give in to the temptation of asking out the hottest girl / guy in our group, just so that if she / he happened to say yes to us, it would be an achievement which could potentially undermine the impact of man landing on the moon!!! And even if we are actually the lucky ones whom God has bestowed upon the gift of a boyfriend / girlfriend, why do we ensure that we try and exhibit our love for each other multiplied by at least a hundred, when we are amongst our other, not so lucky “single” friends?

As, professionals we take it upon ourselves, to plan the most exotic sounding holidays, not because we really want to go to those places, but just because they make us feel like Rocky Balboa amidst all the lesser mortals around us who we call ‘colleagues’. We want to get our hands onto the latest PDA phone so that awesomeness is exhibited in full throttle at work, even if it means that half our salary is guzzled up by this blackberry which is indeed going to make your life go sour.

Let’s admit it. We all have done one or all of the above things, at least once in our lifetimes. But have we asked ourselves as to why exactly did we feel the need to do it?

Impersonal contemplation is the secret of true perspective. Upon truthful introspection, I have come to realise that we humans are the most insecure creations of the Supreme. We have an innate insecurity of acceptance, the fear of rejection. We fear failure at all levels. We therefore want to do everything conceivable to never fail, and when we realise that this might not be possible, we immediately start focusing on developing ways which would help us hide our failures, or at least camouflage them amongst our successes.

We love our cocoons. It takes a while before we let someone in. Especially when our cocoon is so full of things, good and bad that we often run out of place to let someone in. We unknowingly tread the path of irreversible damage, when we fail to make that little space for our real selves in our own cocoons.

In these times of simplistic relationships, instant gratification and immediate responses to all conceivable queries, how we wish we could just Google some answers to life. How we wish it could throw up just perfectly logical solutions to problems of life which prima facie look so insurmountable. Ah, some people call “Religion / Faith” the Google of life, it is expected to throw up results every time you punch in your query, rooted through the medium of the most overworked professional I know of, “GOD”

Some others turn to weirder things like “Vagabondism” – conveniently adopting the “Que Sera Sera” approach, as if to imply that what happens to them is in reality not really of their own doing, it’s happening to them, because God wants it that way, and they, are least bothered.

And then there are some, who are the worst form of control freaks. They want to control everything, including their own destinies. And if that doesn’t quite happen as per their plan, they’re willing to pick up a fight, at the drop of a hat. God and Fate are usually their preferred opponents.

I however, chose to look within. I think I’m my own Google. My own Wikipedia. Whatever there is to know, I know it, just that I’m yet to have full cognizance of it. And I really have no problems in waiting till He thinks the time is right for me to know of it. Instead of looking outwards for answers, I’d rather listen to my own self. This way, I negate the chance of blaming someone else for things that don’t really go right for me, nor do I share credit for all the successes! The next time, you have a life issue that you think you need answers for, I suggest, instead of taking advice from all the ‘gyaanis’ willing to offer help, look within. Just Google life, I’m sure, you’re the best search engine for yourself.

The Awakening - Sonny Carroll

A life changing article I read....A little long... but it's only when you read it completely do you understand the life changing qualities of it!! Thought it best to share!

There comes a time in your life when you finally get it ... When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out "ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on." And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes you begin to look at the world from a new perspective.

..........This is your awakening

You realize that it is time to stop hoping and waiting for something or someone to change, or for happiness safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. You come to terms with the fact that there aren't always fairytale endings (or beginnings for that matter) and that any guarantee of "happily ever after" must begin with you. Then a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

So you begin making your way through the "reality of today" rather than holding out for the "promise of tomorrow." You realize that much of who you are and the way you navigate through life is, in great part, a result of all the social conditioning you've received over the course of a lifetime. And you begin to sift through all the nonsense you were taught about :

- how you should look and how much you should weigh,
- what you should wear and where you should shop,
- where you should live or what type of car you should drive,
- who you should sleep with and how you should behave,
- who you should marry and why you should stay,
- the importance of bearing children or what you owe your family,

Slowly you begin to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And you begin re-assessing and re-defining who you are and what you really believe in. And you begin to discard the doctrines you have outgrown, or should never have practiced to begin with.

You accept the fact that you are not perfect ,and that not everyone will love appreciate or approve of who or what you are... and that's OK... they are entitled to their own views and opinions. And, you come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a "perfect 10".... Or a perfect human being for that matter... and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head or agonizing over how you compare. And, you take a long look at yourself in the mirror and you make a promise to give yourself the same unconditional love and support you give so freely to others. Then a sense of confidence is born of self-approval.

And, you stop maneuvering through life merely as a "consumer" hungry for your next fix, a new dress, another pair of shoes or looks of approval and admiration from family, friends or even strangers who pass by. Then you discover that it is truly in "giving" that we receive, and that the joy and abundance you seek grows out of the giving. And you recognize the importance of "creating" and "contributing" rather than "obtaining" and "accumulating."

And you give thanks for the simple things you've been blessed with, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about - a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, the freedom of choice and the opportunity to pursue your own dreams.

And you begin to love and to care for yourself. You stop engaging in self-destructive behaviors, including participating in dysfunctional relationships. You begin eating a balanced diet, drinking more water and exercising. And because you've learned that fatigue drains the spirit and creates doubt and fear, you give yourself permission to rest. And just as food is fuel for the body, laughter is fuel for the spirit and so you make it a point to create time for play.

Then you learn about love and relationships - how to love, how much to give in love, when to stop giving, and when to walk away. And you allow only the hands of a lover who truly loves and respects you to glorify you with his touch. You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say, intentionally or unintentionally, and that not everyone will always come through... and interestingly enough, it's not always about you. So, you stop lashing out and pointing fingers or looking to place blame for the things that were done to you or weren't done for you. And you learn to keep your Ego in check and to acknowledge and redirect the destructive emotions it spawns - anger, jealousy and resentment.

You learn how to say "I was wrong" and to forgive people for their own human frailties. You learn to build bridges instead of walls and about the healing power of love as it is expressed through a kind word, a warm smile or a friendly gesture. And, at the same time, you eliminate any relationships that are hurtful or fail to uplift and edify you. You stop working so hard at smoothing things over and setting your needs aside. You learn that feelings of entitlement are perfectly OK and that it is your right to want or expect certain things. And you learn the importance of communicating your needs with confidence and grace. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that eventually martyrs are burned at the stake. Then you learn to distinguish between guilt, and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to Say NO. You learn that you don't know all the answers, it's not your job to save the world and that sometimes you just need to Let Go.

Moreover, you learn to look at people as they really are and not as you would want them to be, and you are careful not to project your neediness or insecurities onto a relationship. You learn that you will not be more beautiful, more intelligent, more lovable or important because of the man on your arm or the child that bears your name. You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love and relationships, and that that not everyone can always love you the way you would want them to. So you stop appraising your worth by the measure of love you are given. And suddenly you realize that it's wrong to demand that someone live their life or sacrifice their dreams just to serve your needs, ease your insecurities, or meet "your" standards and expectations. You learn that the only love worth giving and receiving is the love that is given freely without conditions or limitations. And you learn what it means to love. So you stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn that "alone" does not mean "lonely" and you begin to discover the joy of spending time "with yourself" and "on yourself." Then you discover the greatest and most fulfilling love you will ever know - Self Love. And so it comes to pass that, through understanding, your heart heals; and now all new things are possible.

Moving along, you begin to avoid Toxic people and conversations. And you stop wasting time and energy rehashing your situation with family and friends. You learn that talk doesn't change things and that unrequited wishes can only serve to keep you trapped in the past. So you stop lamenting over what could or should have been and you make a decision to leave the past behind. Then you begin to invest your time and energy to affect positive change. You take a personal inventory of all your strengths and weaknesses and the areas you need to improve in order to move ahead, you set your goals and map out a plan of action to see things through.

You learn that life isn't always fair and you don't always get what you think you deserve, and you stop personalizing every loss or disappointment. You learn to accept that sometimes bad things happen to good people and that these things are not an act of God... but merely a random act of fate.

And you stop looking for guarantees, because you've learned that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected and that whatever happens, you'll learn to deal with it. And you learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time - FEAR itself. So you learn to step right into and through your fears, because to give into fear is to give away the right to live life on your terms. You learn that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophesy and you learn to go after what you want and not to squander your life living under a cloud of indecision or feelings of impending doom.

Then, YOU LEARN ABOUT MONEY... the personal power and independence it brings and the options it creates. And you recognize the necessity to create your own personal wealth. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire. And a sense of power is born of self-reliance. And you live with honor and integrity because you know that these principles are not the outdated ideals of a by-gone era but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build your life. And you make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful opportunity and exciting possibility. Then you hang a wind chime outside your window to remind yourself what beauty there is in Simplicity.

Finally, with courage in your heart and with God by your side you take a stand, you FAKE a deep breath and you begin to design the life you want to live as best as you can.

A word about the Power of Prayer: In some of my darkest, most painful and frightening hours, I have prayed, not for the answers to my prayers or for material things, but for my "God" to help me find the strength, confidence and courage to persevere; to face each day and to do what I must do.

Remember this:- You are an expression of the almighty. The spirit of God resides within you and moves through you. Open your heart, speak to that spirit and it will heal and empower you.
My "God" has never failed me.

The Seeker's Song....

I’ve loved, I’ve laughed, I’ve lived and cried,
Every trick in the book I’ve certainly tried.

Success and fame are my loyal pets,
I made a killing on every one of my bets.

I’ve traveled the world over and oceans wide,
I’ve also brought my people honour and pride.

So many of my friends I’ve always bailed,
Seldom before in a venture I’ve ever failed.

Yet somehow at the dusk of my life,
I feel the emptiness and an internal strife.

There’s an urge to hold onto all things fine,
I guess it’s the insecurity of being past my prime.

I’m a seeker and till death I shall seek,
A little bit of love and a caring person to speak,

Death is inevitable and soon it will arrive,
But at that moment I wonder, will there be someone who wished I was alive?

Take my message, to you my heart I pour,
What good is success? does it matter how high you soar?

If at the end, you lament and say…..
"There isn't a single person on this planet,
who gets to know my everything anymore."